Countdown until opening day .....

                                Oktoberfest Visits is an Amazon Affiliates member. Please use Amazon for your purchases; both Oktoberfest and all your other needs. Just click the logo below.

Visit Dave Finlay's Oktoberfest Resources site to learn more about our past visits, some history and interesting anecdotes.
Visit another friendly Oktoberfest Blog; The Bros Oktoberfest. Alcoholische and Betrunken learned everything they know from us.

Click Above to See the Status of the Wiesn.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Thoughts on Train Passes

As usual, BarleyMan is on top of things, recognizing the savings to be had by purchasing "twin" train passes. These passes allow two people to travel together, at a significantly discounted price. Yeee Ha ! ! We are all for saving money.

I hope, however, that BarleyMan has also recognized the logistics involved with these passes; you must travel at all times with the same person. Since there are so many attendees this year, it is quite possible, and highly probable, that there may well be a day trip or two that does not include everyone. So, strategically speaking, who do you pair yourself with? Your significant other, which means you must always travel with the other, or do you pair yourself with someone who's travel plans may more approximate your desires? What a dilemma.

After serious consideration, Chugger and EinFahrt have agreed..... we expect the women to always travel together, and the men to maybe travel with them. So, Chugger and EinFahrt plan to share a twin pass, whilst the Designated Walker and the Virgin will share a pass. This provides the best of all worlds. Designated Walker and Virgin can travel, with or without the significant others. If Chugger and EinFahrt travel as well, everyone is happy.

So, we postulate that BarleyMan needs to share his twin pass with Joe "God is the story over with yet" Shannon. Everyone's thoughts appreciated.

A Challenge for Barbus...

Well Barbus, you earlier asked about tent reservations, and that was certainly a good thought and request. Following the "normal" channels I was unsuccessful. Now the challenge.....

As the fine, young, upstanding business executive you are, why not tap into the vast network of contacts, friends, acquaintances, or just plain groups of people the "owe you big time", and get us a table for Friday or Saturday night?

The baton has been passed, accept it gracefully and lead us to the finish line.

Monday, March 28, 2005

Random Thoughts for First-Timers

As with anything, attending Oktoberfest for the first time has its nuances and challenges for the neophyte. For those of you traveling with us for the first time, remember....

A Maß, sometimes spelled Mass, but pronounced "mahss", has nothing to due with Sunday morning. Unless of course you had too many on Saturday night.

Contrary to public opinion, the infamous Pissorts (a truly efficient marvel of German engineering marvel for relieving one's bladder) are not used to recycle the beer. They are, however, used as a flavoring source for Miller Lite.

When visiting a tent for the first time, it is almost impossible to find a seat. You must slowly work your way onto a bench, one person at a time. Typically the current occupants will welcome you... one at a time. You may even need to attempt to devour adjoining tables. Eventually you will own the table. But be patient. Of course if you are not patient, have a large group, and want to clear a table quickly.... just have Joe start talking with them.

Once seated, remember the golden rule of tent drinking.... do not under any circumstances put your foot/feet on the table! Standing on the benches, however, is not only permitted, but encouraged.

The most accepted way to greet an old friend, or acknowledge a new one, is to raise your Maß, and yell "Prost", or "Ein Prosit". Do this whenever prompted, and you will have friends for life. Of course, follow the salutation with a nice long drink from your Maß.

Singing in the tents is an art form. The best part of singing is you are not required to have a good signing voice, or even know words. There are some verses, however, that you should at least be familiar with, and practice before attending. Please study hard, and remember....
  1. "E - I - E - I - EIO"
  2. "Alice, Alice, who the fuck is Alice?"
  3. "Whisper words of wisdom, Let It Be, Let it Beeeeeeeeeeeeee...."
And the most revered German beer drinking lyric of all time... "Take Me Home, Country Road, to a place, Where I Belooooong, West Virginia, Mountain Momma, Take me Home, Country Road". There will be an exam during our fist meeting at the Hofbrauhaus, so here are all of the words.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Oktoberfest cannot come soon enough


I have been in marketing for a long time, so don't remind me about messaging, and sales, blah, blah,blah.

I just saw the most eggregious affront to values I hold so dear. I am watching the NCAA Basketball game and an ad comes on for Miller Lite. OK, they have a right to their opinion, and some people actually drink the stuff. But come on, having the whole premise of their campaign being the prevention of Taste Loss. It's like lo-cal water. I find the whole notion tasteless. I find the beer tasteless.

Please Lord, make September come soon. I cannot last much longer.

Irreverent towards Germany

IMAO provides tongue-in-cheek commentary on Germany; our host country for the upcoming event.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Change the Rules?

Well fellow Oktoberfestians.... a rule change has been requested. If you remember, when this forum for exchange of ideas was established, one of the few rules, or more appropriately expectations, was that only those committed to this year's event could start new posts. All others, including those not even affiliated with this fine event could comment on existing posts.

Well, go figure. An alum feels slighted. So, even though the alum has not committed, this person feels discriminated against. The question is... should we allow past Oktoberfestians the privilege of posting, or should that honor be reserved for attendees?

As usual, the final decision rests with the administrator.

Tent Reservations ? !

I noticed the possibility of making reservations. What do you think ?

Monday, March 21, 2005

A New Tradition Established During Oktoberfest 2003

While Barbus' previous post very adequately explained the history and long standing traditions of Oktoberfest, it did not identify some of the newer traditions that have emerged. I am specifically talking about a new sport, which we have affectionately titled, Nude Table Surfing. That's correct, you heard it (I mean, read it) properly. We first experienced this great spectator sport during our last visit in 2003.

Nude Table Surfing goes something like this.....
Put two tables at an Oktoberfest tent end-to-end, pour some beer all over the tables, remove your clothes (hence the title), take a two or three step running start, and jump/dive onto the tables, sliding the length of the tables, and hoping that something (or someone) on the other end will cushion your fall.

During our first experience of this event, we had several thoughts running through our mind. You can imagine most of them, all of which pertain to the naked factor. One other thought was how the local security teams would react to this activity. Of course you would think that there would immediately be a large contingent of security at the tables to stop the event; much like what would happen should a fight break out. However, you would be thinking incorrectly.

Remember, the Germans are great at rules. Have a rule, you are in trouble if you break the rule. While the security team did arrive, there was no real effort to stop the event. We surmised that there probably was not a rule against Nude Table Surfing. Security basically allowed the event to come to its normal conclusion... drunk surfers with minor abrasions to parts of their anatomy that we will not discuss at this time.

So, for our trip this year, have the Germans created a rule against Nude Table Surfing? It would be a shame if they did, but it would also be understandable.

The History of Oktoberfest

The Munich Oktoberfest is the largest German "Volksfest" (folk festival) and the only one bearing the name "Oktoberfest" which functions somewhat like a trademark. It promises the world's biggest good-time affair, attended by millions of thirsty souls from all over the globe, and takes place on the "Theresienwiese" with its giant beer tents, where buxom beer maidens serve the precious brew by the liter in large steins, where thirty-piece Bavarian bands rock the thick air, and where there's no end to singing "them old time drinking songs."
The first Oktoberfest was actually part of a marriage celebration when, in October of 1810, Bavarian King Max Joseph gave a big time wedding for Crown Prince Ludwig, later to become King Ludwig I, with the Princess Therese von Sachsen-Hildburghausen. It culminated with a series of horse races and gave rise to the tradition of the October festival, and in the following year, became an annual affair commemorating this grand wedding forevermore. The Oktoberfest we know today, evolved over time and incorporated a number of different traditions.
In the 18th century, horse races, once so popular, were disappearing. Franz Baumgartner, corporal of the national garde, horse lover and owner of a good race horse himself, thought of a way to revive the races. Why not make horse races a part of the marriage celebration! The story goes that one Major Andrä Dall'Armi was designated to lead a delegation of officers of the Guard to suggest it to the King. King Max Joseph was delighted.
Five days after the royal wedding, on October 17, a festival including the horse races, was held on the meadow in front of the Sendlinger Tor, one of Munich's many gates. The royal family, the royal court and the city magistrate were present and the citizens of Munich were invited to attend the festivities. The festival was such a success that it was decided to repeat the horse races in the following year. The Guard cavalry is said to have celebrated accordingly and requested that the race grounds be named "Theresienwiese" in honor of the crown princess. With this began that part of the Oktoberfest tradition--the present-day location--referred to as "d' Wies'n" (the meadow). In 1811 a big agricultural fair was added to the races and by 1818 the first performers and beer pub owners participated. Though the horse races were removed in 1938, many other traditions survived, which made the "Oktoberfest" not only a tourist attraction, but also a door to learning something about the German region of Bavaria and its people.
The Oktoberfest is now celebrated in September, because the chilly Bavarian October winds blowing from the Alps, can surprise with an early cold and snow. The 16-day Fest always starts on a Saturday in September and ends on the 1st Sunday in October. Over time certain rituals evolved which are followed from year to year.
For the Opening day ceremonies, promptly at 11 a.m. a parade enters the grounds on the Wies'n headed by the Münchner Kindl--the little Munich city's coat of arms. The mayor arrives in a festive coach followed by civic dignitaries and horse-drawn brewer's carts decorated with flowers. This colorful ceremony with elaborate floats, beer bands and men, women and children wearing traditional costumes (lederhosen and dirndls) dates back to 1887. More than 7,0000 people participate in the four-mile long parade.
At noon the parade winds its way to the "Schottenhammel" tent which is the oldest private tent at "Oktoberfest." It is here that the mayor will tap the first keg of beer and declare, "o'zapft is!" (The keg is tapped).
In the evening the "Zirkus Krone" may give a two-hour performance. Munich's six major breweries, brewers of the Oktoberfest Märzen beer (Hacker-pschorr, Lowenbrau, Spaten, Hofbrauhaus, Augustiner, Paulaner) are represented in seven festive halls and usually have live music throughout the day and evening. On the second Sunday of Oktoberfest all of the bands performing during the 16 days may gather at the main entrance and give a one-hour concert. And there is dancing and plenty of sideshows, booths, and rides.
If you're hungry, you can stop in at "Schottenhammel" or "Käfers Wies'nschänke" and try the "Brathendl" (the grilled chicken) or "a Münchner Weisse," the veal sausage only found in Bavaria. For fish lovers there is trout and eel grilled outdoors on long sticks and sausages galore abound for the festival-goers.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

What am I doing here?

Sorry troops, I've been absent lately. I'm at school this weekend, and we just finished our marketing class, and had a great tie in to this topic. We were discussing the marketing of beer. I mentioned that Oktoberfest is the best marketing tool available. It generates demand early, keeps us drinking for the next 6 months, and maintains demand during and after the event. What more could you ask for?

Don't know what's up with this educational system, but Operations Management is next, and we'll be talking about the beer distribution model. I love this MBA stuff ! !

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Beer Trouble Shooting

Last Oktoberfest I met a Beer expert and consulted him on a couple of symptoms happened to me. I like to share his ideas and advice.

SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points towardceiling.

SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
FAULT: Improper bladder control.
ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about housetraining.

SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless.
FAULT: Glass empty.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.
FAULT: You have fallen over backward.
ACTION: Have yourself leashed to bar. S

SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
FAULT: You have fallen forward.
ACTION: See above.

SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part offace.
ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.

SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
FAULT: You are being carried out.
ACTION: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.

SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark.
FAULT: Bar has closed.
ACTION: Confirm home address with bartender.

SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect andtextures.
FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
ACTION: Cover mouth.

SYMPTOM: Everyone looks up to you and smiles.
FAULT: You are dancing on the table.
ACTION: Fall on somebody cushy-looking.

Is this true?

Beer is better than a Religion
10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.
9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.
8. Beer has never caused a major war.
7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
6. When you have a Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over his brand of Beer.
4. You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second Beer.
3. There are laws saying Beer labels can't lie to you.
2. You can prove you have a Beer.
1. If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

I'm Sure I'll Get Into Trouble, but...

My wife said, and although this isn't an exact quote, "the girls will go somewhere during the day." Now, to me that means.... Yeee Haa ! ! Off they go, hopefully to some culturally significant destination, but more importantly, leaving us guys alone to sample local hops.

Am I in trouble for interpreting the comment that way? Or am I correct, and the rest of you beer aficionados just don't have the ... to tell it like it is? Thumbs Up

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Time to start learning German!

In order to be fluent, the team needs to start learning key German phrases and words. While Bier, Ja, Nein, Nicht, Bahnhof, Hendl, Poleiz, wurst, wasser, Pissort are enough to get by for the whole week, to truly experience Germany requires extra work on our linguistic abilities....

Word of the week (very important based on previous trips...)

Schoaß (n.) methane containing, foul smelling puff, often caused by digestion procedures. Not popular in the beer tents.

Not popular on trains, or the hotel rooms either.

Monday, March 14, 2005

A Virgin's First Experience

At Oktoberfest, that is .

With that said, my first experience was in 1987 as part of a business trip to Augsburg. One boring September eve, we were sitting in the bar at the hotel. It was around 21:00, and someone said, "Hey, why don't we go to Munich, it's Oktoberfest you know". I looked at Tom (last name to remain a mystery) and said, "Why not, when's the next train". We checked with the bartender, and the next train was at 21:30; plenty of time. Ok, but when can we get back? A good sounding time was 01:00, and there was a train at 01:12ish, so off we went. Ran to the Hauptbahnhof and made the train. Upon arrival in Munich, we headed directly to the Wiesn. Boy what a sight. Just imagine a huge state fair with large circus tents full of drunks.

Not knowing any better, we headed to the first tent (in retrospect I think it was the Hippodrom). This was a Friday night, and not knowing any better, we tried to get a seat and order a beer. Good luck you neophytes ! ! But after e few minutes, we were successful. That's because it was so late the place was beginning to close. So we quickly ordered our first Mas, had it delivered, and enjoyed the brew. Unfortunately, either because of the time, or our slow drinking (I'm sure it wasn't the latter) we couldn't get another beer. So we headed out, fought the crowds, and tried to find a taxi. Tom said, "Hey it's still early and the train isn't until 01:12, should we have a beer"? But of course, so we jumped in a taxi and headed to the Hofbrauhaus.

Just our luck, got there just in time to have one Mas. What's with this country, the land of beer, and everything closes so early? So we had our brew, and headed back out to find another fine establishment. This didn't take long, we just wandered a few blocks from the Hofbrauhaus and found a great bar, lot's of people, and asked "How late you open"? We got the response we wanted... "All night" ! ! ! Yeee Ha! Let's get drinking.

We sat at the bar drinking and playing Deckles (a topic for another post), until about 02:00, when we said "Oops, guess we missed the train. When's the next one?" The train was at 04:00, so we had plenty of time for a few more. Which we proceeded to do. Well, guess what, we missed the 04:00 train, and had to settle for the 05:30 train. Finally got back to the hotel in Augsburg around 06:45.

As we were entering the hotel, Tom and I noticed our other business associates coming down for breakfast. Looking at our watches, and trying not to look too guilty, we asked "Why's everyone having breakfast so early on a Saturday?". The answer.... after we left, they decided as a group to get up early and head to Munich to experience Oktoberfest. After looking at each other, we said, "Give us a few minutes to shower and change, and we'll be right with you". So.....

Saturday was then spent tent hopping and doing other things with hops We were actually able to get seats, and enjoy the bands and atmosphere (more on that in another post as well). The table, at the Hacker-Pschorr tent was obtained by our German host, Gerhard Borgenheimer ! ! ! What a great German name.

Here's two wonderful pictures from that very first trip..

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Don't Buy Larry's Book.....Yet!

In case you haven't read the Holy Writ on "Beer Drinkers Guide to Munich", wait until the 5th edition comes out in April. It promises to be updated wisdom from Larry himself.

Oktoberfest Tool Kit

Alosius, the Bavarian fairy tale goes, descended from heaven to deliver a note from God to the Bavarian government, but got so sidetracked drinking beer in the Hofbrauhaus that he never got around to making the delivery. If Bavarian beer is reason enough for one man to give up his place in heaven, it's no wonder that each year 6 million people from all over the world descend on Munich for the Oktoberfest - the granddaddy of beer festivals. More......

Beer Poems

Apart from their esthetic and cultural contribution, Beer Poems are meant to emphasize the importancy of this Drink of the Gods. So let us start to publish.

Why We Love Beer
Beer is a drink
That won’t help you think.
Nor will it open your eyes
To what is true and wise.
Beer is a brew
That helps you get through.
Drink, and you’ll rise
Above UMass to the skies.
Forget the true and the wise.
Isn’t this your deepest desire:
To rise above the muck and mire?
If so, join the guys.

Friday Lament
It’s Friday. Throat dry.
Chalky hands. Why do I
Work so hard? Email overflowing.
Where am I going?
The world is rushing past
At the speed of light.
Did last week last
An hour? It’s nearly night.
Ah. Escape is here.
Rafters. Friends. Beer.
No Beer, No Work
The shades of night was fallin' slow
As through New York a guy did go
And nail on ev'ry barroom door
A card that this here motter bore:
"No beer, no work."
His brow was sad, his mouth was dry;
It was the first day of July,
And where, all parched and scorched it hung,
These words was stenciled on his tongue:
"No beer, no work."
"Oh, stay," the maiden said, "and sup
This malted milk from this here cup."
A shudder passed through that there guy,
But with a moan he made reply:
"No beer, no work."
At break of day, as through the town
The milkman put milk bottles down,
Onto one stoop a sort of snore
Was heard, and then was heard no more—
"No beer, no work."
The poor old guy plumb dead was found
And planted in the buryin' ground,
Still graspin' in his hand of ice
Them placards with this sad device:
"No beer, no work."

One Last Beer
Alone I am and the weather is cold.

My girlfriend's not here for me to behold!
A beer I want for my red tounge to taste.

I run to the 'fridge in a heavenly haste!
Is there one last beer I think to myself,

as i eximine the refridgerator shelf.
A glass of sweet jam is all I ever find!

Or have my blue eyes gone completely blind?
In fear I walk to the basement cold.

To search for a beer from times very old!
Now what did I find as I looked through the shelf?

A beer that my father had hid for himself!
My last beer I drink as I write these words.

For summer I wait and the singing of birds.

WARNING !!!!!!

Due to increasing products liability litigation, the German beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that during Oktoberfest the following warning labels be placed on all beer containers and glasses:

Consumption of beer may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
Consumption of beer is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.
Consumption of beer may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
Consumption of beer may cause you to thay shings like thish.
Consumption of beer may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
Consumption of beer may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.
Consumption of beer may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
Consumption of beer may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
Consumption of beer may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).
Consumption of beer is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
Consumption of beer may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter and more handsome than some really, really big guy named FRANZ.
Consumption of beer may lead you to believe you are invisible.
Consumption of beer may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
Consumption of beer may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
Consumption of beer may actually CAUSE pregnancy.

The morning after....

Maybe more appropriately titled... "headaches AREN'T us"! That's right, for you first timers accustomed to the typical morning hangover caused by the Bud Flu, or the Miller Lite experience, not to worry. In addition to being great tasting, and fresh, German beer has this unique quality to not make you feel bad in the morning. The Germans figured it out.... if you feel bad in the morning, you may not drink more beer.

Because of the freshness and lack of preservatives and carbonation, you will not experience the hang-over headache. This is not to say you will not be tired running for that 06:22 train after head meets pillow at 02:00. You just won't have that pounding Excedrin Headache number 99.

Coming soon, some reflections on our first trip, inspired by Barleyman's synopsis of how this all came about. Read about that here.

107 reasons beer is better than woman

translation probably is not preferred, but if you wish and I can get protection........... :-)

Ein Bier wird nie eifersüchtig, wenn Du ein anderes Bier nimmst.
In einer Bar kannst Du immer ein Bier mitnehmen.
Ein Kater geht weg.
Ein Bier wird nicht verärgert, wenn Du mit einer Fahne nach Hause kommst.
Du brauchst ein Bier nicht zu waschen, bevor es gut schmeckt.
Ein Bier kann man den ganzen Monat lang genießen.
Ein Bier braucht man nicht ausführen und bewirten.
Wenn Du mit einem Bier fertig bist, bekommst Du immer noch Flaschenpfand.
Ein steriles Bier ist ein gutes Bier.
Du kannst Dir sicher sein, Du bist der erste, der das Bier hat.
Du kannst mehr als ein Bier pro Nacht haben und Dich nicht schuldig fühlen.
Du kannst ein Bier mit Deinen Freunden teilen.
Ein Bier ist immer feucht.
Ein Bier geht schnell runter.
Bierflecken kann man auswaschen.
Ein Bier wartet immer geduldig im Wagen auf Dich.
Wenn ein Bier unten gelandet ist, wirft man es weg.
Ein Bier kommt nie zu spät.
Bieretiketten kann mein einfach von der Flasche abziehen.
Ein Bier hat nie Kopfschmerzen.
Wenn Du ein Bier gut genug trinkst, hast Du immer ein gutes Gefühl im Kopf.
Ein Bier verlangt nicht nach Gleichberechtigung.
Ein Bier kümmert's nicht, wann Du heimkommst.
Biere kommen immer in Sechserpacks...
Man kann ein Bier in aller Öffentlichkeit trinken.
Man kann sich außer Kopfschmerzen nichts anderes von einem Bier einfangen.
Wenn Du mit einem Bier fertig bist, mußt Du nichts anderes tun als die leere Flasche wegwerfen.
Ein Bier kostet nie mehr als 5 Dollar (Amis... :-) ) und wird dich nie durstig lassen.
Wenn Du mit einem Bier fertig bist, nimm das nächste.
Du wirst nie Bieretiketten auf der Wange haben...
Bier schaut am Morgen genauso wie am Abend aus.
Ein Bier schaut nicht regelmäßig bei Dir vorbei.
Ein Bier stört es nicht, wenn jemand das Zimmer betritt.
Ein Bier stört es nicht, die Kinder zu wecken.
Ein Bier bekommt keine Krämpfe.
Ein Bier hat keine Mutter.
Ein Bier hat keine Moral.
Ein Bier spielt nicht einmal im Monat verrückt.
Ein Bier hört Dir immer geduldig zu und streitet niemals.
Bieretiketten kommen nicht einmal im Jahr aus der Mode.
Bieretiketten sind im Preis schon mit enthalten.
Bier weint nicht, es blubbert.
Ein Bier hat nie kalte Hände oder Füße.
Ein Bier verlangt nicht nach Gerechtigkeit.
Ein Bier ist nie übergewichtig.
Wenn Du die Biersorte wechselst, brauchst Du kein Unterhalt zu zahlen.
Ein Bier wird nie mit Deiner Kreditkarte abhauen.
Ein Bier hat keinen Rechtsanwalt.
Ein Bier braucht nicht viel Platz im WC.
Ein Bier kann Dir keine Krankheiten wie Herpes zufügen.
Einem Bier kümmert Dein Fahrstil nicht.
Ein Bier wechselt nicht seine Meinung.
Einem Bier kümmert es nicht, ob Du rülpst oder einen fahren läßt.
Ein Bier ärgert Dich nicht.
Ein Bier fragt nicht danach, das Fernsehprogramm zu wechseln.
Ein Bier bringt Dich nicht dazu, Einkaufen zu gehen.
Ein Bier bringt Dich auch nicht dazu, den Müll rauszubringen.
Ein Bier bringt Dich auch nicht dazu, den Rasen zu mähen.
Ein Bier kümmert's nicht, Chuck Norris oder Charles Bronson-Filme zu sehen.
Ein Bier hat man sehr leicht bei der Hand.
Dicke, volle Biere sind umso besser.
Ein Bier sagt nie nein.
In einem Bier kann man sich leicht reinversetzen.
Ein Bier beschwert sich nicht, wenn Du es irgendwohin mitnimmst.
Auf einer Party verschwindet das Bier nicht zusammen mit anderen Bieren.
Ein Bier trägt kein BH.
Ein Bier kümmert's nicht, schmutzig zu werden.
Ein Bier stört sich nicht an Gefühllosigkeit.
Ein Bier verbraucht nicht das gesamte Toilettenpapier.
Ein Bier lebt nicht mit seiner Mutter zusammen.
Ein Bier macht Dich nicht schlapp.
Ein Bier kümmert sich nicht um Manieren.
Ein Bier schreit nicht herum.
Ein Bier kümmert sich nicht um die Fußball-Saison.
Ein Bier schleppt Dich sicher nicht mit zur Kirche.
Ein Bier kann 'Vergaser' sicher besser buchstabieren als eine Frau.
Ein Bier denkt nicht, Fußball sei bescheuert aus wer weiß was für Gründen.
Ein Bier hat oftmals mehr Ahnung von Computer als eine Frau...
Ein Bier wird nicht sauer, wenn Du andere Biere in Deiner Nähe hast.
Ein Bier wird nie behaupten, diese Werbungen mit den Babies sind irgendwie "süß".
Wenn ein Bier ausläuft, riecht es für eine Weile irgendwie gut...
Ein Bier nennt Dich sicher kein sexistisches Schwein, weil Du "Dobermann" statt "Doberperson" sagst.
Ein Bier erhebt kein Geschrei über solche Kleinigkeiten wie einen hochgeklappte Toilettensitz.
Wenn Du ein "5500 ccm V8" in der Nähe eines Bieres erwähnst, denkt es sicher nicht an einer riesigen Büchse Gemüsesaft.
Ein Bier beschwert sich nicht, daß Sicherheitsgurte wehtun.
Ein Bier raucht nicht im Auto.
Ein Bier streitet nicht damit rum, daß es keinen Unterschied darin gäbe, ein unidentifiziertes Flogobjekt im Kriegsgebiet abzuschießen und ein koreanisches Verkehrsflugzeug vom Himmel zu holen.
Ein Bier kauft nie ein Auto mit Automatikgetriebe.
Ein Bier ist immer bereit, das Haus rechtzeitig zur Party zu verlassen.
Ein Bier wartet nicht auf Komplimente.
Einige Biere (St. Pauli Girl) haben super Titten...
Bier schmeckt einfach gut.
Wenn Du ein Bier zuerst nur anschauen und später dann doch austrinken willst, erhebt es sicher kein Geschrei.
Selbst ein eiskaltes Bier wird Dich gewähren lassen.
Ein Bier wird Dich nie dazu bringen, vom Einkaufen ein paar Tampons mitzubringen.
Ein Bier kümmert es nicht, daß Du liegst, wenn Du gerade den "Penthouse" nach Deiner Aussage "nur wegen der Artikel" liest.
Ein Bier sagt nie, Du könntest ins Gefängnis kommen, wenn Du ein Fußballspiel ohne einer ausdrückliche Zustimmung der dafür zuständigen Stellen auf Video aufzeichnest.
Ein Bier würde nie Deinen Wagen mit dem schlechtesten Benzin volltanken mit der Begründung, daß man dadurch die paar Pfennige spart.
Ein Bier wird Dich nie dazu bringen, einen schwedischen Film zu sehen.
Ein Bier bringt Dich nicht dazu, irgendetwas Vegetarisches zu essen, das einfach abscheulich schmeckt.
Ein Bier wird nie den Satz benutzen: "Iß - es ist sehr gesund." (Gerade dieser Satz verdirbt so manchen den Appetit)
Bist Du mit einem Bier fertig, macht der Gedanke an ein anderes Bier Dich nicht krank.
Ein Bier lügt nie.
Ein Bier geht nicht fremd.
Ein Bier kann kein Unfall mit Deinem Wagen machen.
Bei einem Bier weiß man vorher auf den Pfennig genau, was es kosten wird.
Einem Bier kümmert es nicht, wenn Du die ganze Nacht am Computer verbringst.

Oktoberfest Witzen

`a start to learn the German language for those who need it`

Oktoberfest in München. Durch Überbelastung explodiert eine der Weißwurst-Fabriken. Eine Weißwurst fliegt bis vor Petrus. Der wiederum staunt und rätselt was das denn wohl sein könne. Gott wirds schon wissen, denkt er sich und marschiert los. Dort angekommen fragt er: "Sag mal Gott, weißt du was dies hier ist?" "Mmmmm, keine Ahnung, aber frag doch mal Jesus. Der war schließlich 30 Jahre dort!" erwidert Gott. Petrus marschiert los und fragt Jesus: "Sag mal, Jesus, weißt du wofür diese Dinger unten gebraucht werden?" Jesus nimmt die Wurst in die Hand, schüttelt sodann den Kopf und sagt: "Tut mir leid Petrus, aber als ich unten war, gabs sowas, glaub ich, noch nicht. Aber frag doch mal Maria, die war schließlich ein ganzes Leben lang dort!" Petrus marschiert also weiter und stellt sodann Maria die gleiche Frage. Maria nimmt die Wurst in die Hand und antwortet: "Also genau kann ich Dir auch nicht sagen, was es ist. Aber anfühlen tut sichs wie der heilige Geist!..."

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Sehr Gut

Sehr Gut! Ich bin ein blogger!

Recommendations: Down Right Stolen, Plagiarized and Copy & Pasted from a Team Member's Web Site

Thanks to our California Contingent for starting this list. I freely admit copyright violation and stealing it from his web site. I thought it was so appropriate, the entire world needed to be enlightened. If some of these don't make sense to you, then you now have a better idea of what you are missing. Please append your thoughts as well.........
  • Get plenty of rest before you arrive. we go non stop.
  • Go with the group. A laid back atmosphere is critical in Bavaria

  • Eat a lot of food. It will provide a good base for the beer

  • Try new things. Even if you have never had Haxen, and think it looks too much like a pig knuckle, try it anyway*.

  • Sleep on the train. Just make sure there is someone awake to make sure you get off at the stop.

  • Check out the German Rail Passes. They have 3 or 5 day passes that allow you to go on the DB and S-Bahn lines. In the US you can get these at AAA. The only issue is that the twin passes require you to travel together (i.e. you get one pass)

  • Make sure you try the Gyros in the little shop near the Hotel Alfa. ask for them 'spicy'.

  • Don't ask for wine at the Beer Tent

  • Don't ride the upside down rides after eating a hendel, a bretzel, 2 sausages, a radish, and 4 Maß of Bier.

  • For $50 they will let you lead the band.

  • They don't serve ice like they do in the states. Even at Burger King. In fact, the Burger King doesn't make ice until after 11am. even then you get one cube for a big gulp.

  • Try not to attend over the daylight savings time change. They get really confused, as do you. You may even show up early for your train.

  • Wear comfortable waterproof clothes. between the rain and the beer, you need to keep dry. Many times we will leave the hotel early in the morning and return early the next day.

  • Never, under any circumstances, look inside a sausage.

  • Never sit at a table with a sign on it that says something scary in German

  • Make sure you sit near the Aussies and Kiwis in the beer tents. Have your camera ready at all times.

  • Don't complain.

  • Have fun, enjoy seeing old friends, and remember, What goes on in Munich, stays in Munich.

*Note: This rule does not apply to Tuna fish pizza.

German Rail Passes

I checked on German Rail Passes and believe it or not, the prices have not changed. This may be an even better deal than before.

German rail 2nd class twin passes are $270 for 4 days. They are $180 for a 2nd class single pass. With the Euro so strong against the dollar, this is a great deal. You can check out the rate table here

I assume we will all be traveling second class?? These passes are available at AAA. If I remember correctly, they take a few days, so don't wait until the last minute.

For our Holland friends, I assume they have good deals for you as well. Is there a DAA? ;-)

As The Beatles said.... "Day Tripper, yeah ! !"

Well, almost. As I sit down to do one of my mid-terms today, I'm looking for any excuse to procrastinate. I thought I would start the topic pertaining to the second most important part of the trip.... our day trips. For the repeat offenders, you know what I mean. For the newbies, we take day trips during the day to various culturally significant spots (aka they serve beer), then return to Munich for frivolity in the evening. We typically try to limit our day trips to a maximum 2 hr. one way train ride. That gives us plenty of time to see the sights, and be able to be back late afternoon or early evening.

So, while we have three days for trips this time (Saturday, Sunday and Monday), there can certainly be more than three trips available. Everyone does not need to go to the same place, and we actually encourage that since some destinations offer things some of you may not enjoy.

Maybe like the barfatorium at Kloster Andechs...

Kloster Andechs is always our traditional destination on Sunday. It provides us our religious pilgrimage, while satisfying our thirst for freshly brewed beer from a the oldest Monkery we know of. Also, what's a Sunday without pork products as well.

Other recommendations for this year include a return to Neuschwanstein, a trip to Würzburg, for some wine tasting, maybe a trip to Dachau to see either the concentration camp or the beautiful city. Now's the time to start thinking about other alternatives as well. As I said, everyone does not need to go together, or to the same places. With this large crowd, we might even encourage that.

So..... what do you think? I'll chime back in later.

For You First Timers...


If you have never blogged before, there are two ways for you to participate. First, if you are a committed traveler to this year's event, you will have or will shortly receive an email describing how to sign-up. Basically you must ...

1) follow the link in the email, 2) at bottom of the screen click the Create Account link, 3) fill out the information, 4) click the Continue link, and 5) voila, you are in. You will then be able to create a new post or respond to an existing post.

To respond to an existing post, just bring up the blog at and click on the "comments" link of the topic. You will be given a form to put in your comment, and your sign-in information. Enter your information and click Login and Publish.

To post new topic, you need to go to and be sure to sign-in. Select the Oktoberfest Visits blog name, and you will go to a screen that allows you to Post a new topic.

For the casual observer, just click "comments" on a topic and "follow-the yellow brick road".

Friday, March 11, 2005

Important Decisions

This year we will have a number of challenges we have not experienced in the past. The biggest one I see is the number of people in our party. In past years, any group over 5 people had a hard time getting seats in the tents, tables at the Beer Halls, but not problems in the gardens. We need to be tolerant of the inconveniences, and just split up when necessary.

The thing I liked about previous trips is that they were fairly random, with little planning, for maximum enjoyment. We basically did anything we wanted to, and pretty much the whole group would go along, as long as it involved Beer.

The organizing team is preparing INFORMATION for everyone to consider on DayTrips, etc., but it is by no means a recommendation. we can discuss on the Blog, but we shouldn't do too much decision making until we have adequate lubrication in our systems. ;-)

Rules of the Road for the Blog

As we finish up this first day in bloggus-sphere, just a few quick words on etiquette. There will be a core group of administrators to keep everyone honest. We don't expect any issues, but you never know. We reserve the right to edit or delete any posts that are too offensive, or not offensive enough.

For those members of this year's team of committed attendees, you will be able to create new posts, as well as respond to others. Should anyone else desire to be able to start a post, please let us know and we will consider your request.

As the days progress, we hope you will continue to provide your feedback to our ramblings. So, to start things off, a little bit about this year's trip........

Most of us arrive in Munich on 29 September, with the remainder of the group arriving on 30 September. If it wasn't for jobs and limits on Frequent Flyer tickets we would all be arriving together. We then all leave town on 4 October; hopefully leaving our hangovers behind. Since this is the final weekend of Oktoberfest, we are looking forward to a new approach to the festivities. We have been to opening weekend, as well as the middle weekends, but never in town for the end. I wonder if the beer still tastes as good...


Hello everyone, and welcome to our Oktoberfest Blog. As the description says, this is dedicated to our many trips to Munich to visit Oktoberfest; this year being our next sojourn. There is a core group of us that have been traveling to this event for over 12 years, and we have officially anointed ourselves as 'experts.' We will use this forum for many purposes; describing our past events, planning our next event, providing helpful tips and insight, and just plain "bloggin' around". Much of what we hope to do is get you excited about considering a trip to Oktoberfest, and provide you with what we believe is the best way to do it; almost like your very own travel agent ! ! !.

Got a question, got some input, let us know. More importantly, let your friends know. Interested in other Blogs... check out