My Last Will and Testament

My fellow Oktoberfestians
It is with heavy heart that I must announce that I think I am going to die of this plague I picked up in Munich. I guess it's fairly appropriate that some germ I caught while drinking kills me. Anyway, I would like to leave you all with some remebrances of me....Like who could forget me anyway?
To Jack (you're first because I am convinced I caught the plague from you) I leave a bottle of Jaegermeister....remember friends don't let friends drink this crap.
To Barleyman (my husband) I leave......the kids....Ha, serves you right!!!!
To Mac (AKA speedy civic) I leave my degrees and all the accompanying letters that go after my name. My office is your office, but remember my job is not as exciting as it sounds.
To Designated Walker I leave my love for German beer...makes Oktoberfest much more fun!
To Chugger I leave my cats, since you seem to love herding them so much.
To Einfart I leave all my Micheal Moore books and films, I'm sure you'll enjoy them.
To Candy I leave all my Conde Nast magazines and travel books to help you go all those places on your list.
To Jane I leave my Ann Coulter voodoo doll, have fun with it!
To Barbus and Schlumberger Lady I leave a bottle of Dom Perignon and 2 beer steins to drink it with.
To Grumpy I leave your own set of leiderhosen, I think you will look wunderval in them!
To Bonnie I leave the Italians, the Aussies, the Austrians, etc, and my lecherous heart.
To Ludwig II and Agnes I leave my dictionary of American slang, with an emphasis on California....whatever!
To Sam I leave my dancing shoes.
To Jim I leave a case of Miller Lite.
If I do die, please sprinkle my ashes over the Paulaner tent at the next Oktoberfest, and raise a mug to me while the band plays "Alice"...Ein Prosit!!!!