Perspective on the World Series

Yes, friends, my beloved Tigers lost the world series. After a great season, they looked sloppy in their losses to St Louis. But it was a fantastic season, and the biggest turn around for any MLB team ever. Something like 14 losing seasons, then they are in The Show.

Now to those of you who felt it necessary to call me and remind me that the Tigers lost, I have a few points to make:

1. The Tigers had a great season, beating "expert" predictions by a wide margin.
2. No team from Ohio made the playoffs, let alone made it to The Show.
3. One caller's college team (Bowling Green) lost to the Temple Owls. The Tempble Owls have not won a game since November...... 2004! I did not call this friend, because I have pity for him and his ilk.
4. It's 85 and sunny where I am. That makes up a lot for losing a baseball game. ;-0

Herr Doppelbock Has a Smokier side!

DoppleBob?

I think not!

It's Rauch Bob!

He looks so Happy.

Welcome to doppleboch

While a new member to the blog has silently registered, he is known by many. A veteran of past sojourns, Herr Doppleboch is one to be accepted.

In other words.... say Hi to "BobR"

Grand BeerMugPoobah

Have you noticed that there are two basic types of Oktoberfestians? There are the smart, educated ones (mostly female) with engineering and medical degrees, for example. And then there are the Oktoberfestians who are essentially monkeys with Beer Mugs. We call them BeerMugHolders. I think we need different strategies for dealing with them.Now before you go and accuse me of racial insensitivity, remember that the BeerMugHolders are my race (Caucasian). They are simply uneducated. What I’m about to say will seem unkind, but it’s an objective fact that almost everything the BeerMugHolders do can be taught to a chimp, e.g. ride motorcycles, shoot rifles, eat, wear pyjamas, poop.If you make a list of all the things monkeys do NOT do, then compare it to the list of things the BeerMugHolders likewise do NOT do, you’d find a lot of similarities. Monkeys don’t read and write, don’t use computers, don’t play Scrabble, don’t invent anything, and so forth. To be fair, the BeerMugHolders do have language skills whereas monkeys can only use sign language. But the point is that we shouldn’t use the same strategy with the BeerMugHolders that we use with the smart Oktoberfestians. We’ll have to “quarantine” the smart ones, e.g. let them go to Scotland (Inverness). We can outsmart the dumb ones.Here’s my plan. I call it the Grand BeerMugPoobah. As I understand the Oktoberfest system, faithful Oktoberfestians such as the BeerMugHolders tend to do whatever their higher religious authorities instruct them to do. And in most cases the faithful have never personally seen the highest religious authority in their chain of command. That’s extra true if you are an illiterate BeerMugHolders goober with no TV or radio. Everything is based on word of mouth.So what we should do is hire an actor (Borat ?) to assume the role of the highest religious figure in the BeerMugHolders religious hierarchy. I call him the Grand BeerMugPoobah. Then you take him on a tour around Bavaria so everyone can see him and spread the world. You might need to hire a few thousand extras to act as his groupies, just to impress onlookers. We could use all of our Hollywood expertise to make the Grand BeerMugPoobah seem authentic. He’d have an impressive back story about his humble origins and his rise to the highest level of BeerMugPoobahdom. Ideally, he could learn some mind reading tricks from Penn and Teller just to wow the crowd. He might even predict the future, such as tomorrow’s weather, because even that would impress the BeerMugHolders.Once the Grand BeerMugPoobah has established himself as the ultimate religious authority, he can start issuing orders. For example, he can order the BeerMugHolders to subsidize the smart Oktoberfestians when going to Scotland. You might think it would be hard to convince the BeerMugHolders that the Grand BeerMugPoobah is their new religious authority. But consider that the BeerMugHolders are perhaps the world’s most gullible people. And you don’t need to win over every single BeerMugHolder. All you need is a simple majority because the majority will then kill the minority. Problem solved.This probably won’t be the plan that wins me the Nobel Beer Prize. But can you think of any reason it wouldn’t work?

Let the Hotel Discussions Begin

With the approval of the Grand Puhba, I have made reservations for four double rooms at the infamous (sometimes chastised) Hotel Alfa. These four rooms are for arrival on 21 September, with departure on 25 September. The price is 215 Euros per night, and we must make full payment in April.

So, since I believe I will be sharing a room with Einfahrt, who speaketh for the other three rooms?

"The Boys Are Back In Town" (Thin Lizzy, 1976)

Let the postings resume ! ! !